Thursday, May 15

Words and Mots

I think what my firend who hates the random uses of random hates the most is that so very often tossing in odd or unexpectedly is so much more appropriate.

Example:



I was in Roma staying with a friend of mine and unexpectedly he asked if i'd like to tag along on one of his guided tours through the Vaticant Museum and Cistine Chapel and St. Peter's Basilica.

bum, i don't know for sure what my plans are for toda..
you wouldn't have to pay
i think something just cleared up


His client that afternoon was a group from some credit card company
which turned out not so much a group but a father a son duo; the president of whatever was showing his dad the Vaticant. Who, despite a constant effort from
the son to keep the tour moving, wanted to stop at every single bit of art.
Oddly enough it reminded me of another father/son relationship; not the one I am
part of, but one that I might resemble in a few years.



Now, on the other hand there are times when a word simply must be used because no other word can express exactly what happened.

Example:

While we were engrossed in one of my friends explainations of a peice of art I heard a gasp to my left.

A girl is walking in the vaticant museum. The tour she had taken earlier had ended and she was doubling back to take in more of what the trou guide had rushed by. She crumples up a bit of paper the guide had given her a few moments ago. "Weirdo" she says as she tosses the number into the trash bin, "i'll bet he gives it to ever girl on his tour". She looks up to some art on the wall, a tapestry of Raphiel, and notices a Canada patch a bag just up ahead. As she gets closer to the group she see's they are listening intently to their own tour guide. Instead of interupting she decides to pass on by. However, as she is passing by she recognizes the shirt that Canada patch is wearing.

I hear a gasp to my left, however before I can react the gasp has turned into a low shout.

HOLY SHIT! BRAD?

An echo rolls down the hallway shaking the tapestries and turning heads.

I can't beleive it! and neither could I. did she just say that in the Vaticant? i thought to myself. Nevertheless, standing in front of me, in Rome of all places, was Shirley.

I grabbed her by the arm and lead her away before she brought the house down with more blasphemy.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

speaking of blasphemy i received the first forward in years that actually made me laugh. you've probably seen it, but if not go to google images and search for blasphemy. it was the first one that came up for me.

Anonymous said...

are you calling the vatican the vaticant as a not so veiled shot at the church?

--b said...

thanks anonymous, that was terrible. i assume it wasn't the baseball picture, but the ... well, the other one.

i must be off to confession for laughing so hard i peed my pants, as sin which made Pope Ben's new top 100 list.

and dan, take you're spellcheque somewere else. ewe and your gramma police are smoothering me and my creativity.

Anonymous said...

well no, i just thought calling it the vaticant was clever because you know like... they say you "vati-cant" do anything fun! zing!

no? I was trying to see creativity and all I got was a slap in the face